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Looking for different dating sites?
40 plus dating can feel a little daunting. There are endless reasons why you might be single. It might be that you simply haven’t found the right person yet, that you’ve been through a divorce, or even suffered a bereavement.
However, hitting your mid-life period doesn’t mean that your dating life is done. There are now plenty of over 40 dating apps and websites, allowing you to date people from older age groups.
While the idea of hanging out in a nightclub might fill you with horror, being more mature doesn’t mean you should avoid diving back into the dating pool. In many ways, 40-plus dating can be more exciting and rewarding than when you were younger.
For many singles who are into their fourth decade, the desire to date is still strong, but knowing where to start is another thing entirely. With technology advancing so quickly, trying to decide which over 40s dating apps to use, and which are the best dating sites for over 40 singles, can be a challenge.
That’s where we come in. Read our no-nonsense guide to the best dating sites for over 40 singles and you’ll have enough information to decide which ones tick all the right boxes.
Why is dating in your 40s better than when you were younger?
The perceived negatives
For many, the big issue with dating in later life is that there may be children involved. While this is a possibility, it shouldn’t put you off; blended families are very much the norm these days and can be incredibly rewarding.
In the case of bereavement, you might feel that you’d be constantly living in the shadow of the partner who’s passed on. However, there’s no point in comparing yourself with that person. Ultimately, the relationship you share with someone will be different from the one they had. No better or worse, just different.
You may also have financial concerns, particularly if you’ve been through a divorce. However, letting your money rule your love-life is a sure-fire way to scupper any future romance. Sometimes, you just have to roll the dice and see what happens.
40 plus dating might seem like a veritable minefield, but that depends on how you look at things. Now that you’re in your 40s, you’ve got more life experience and a much better idea of what you do and don’t want from a relationship.
Over-40 dating apps and dating sites can introduce you to an online dating world where you can get to know people from older age groups before you even consider meeting them face to face.
The pros of dating in your 40s
Unless you’re in the throes of a mid-life crisis, you’ll know that dating singles from older age groups can be infinitely more rewarding than dating those who are considerably younger than you. You’re far more likely to have similar interests and similar life experiences.
As a result, you won’t have to suffer never-ending conversations about the latest music, or which social media platforms are the best. Instead, you can concentrate on enjoying the important things in life, such as mutually stimulating chats and walks in the park.
However, that’s not to say that the physical side of things is doomed to be a distant memory. While women reach their sexual peak at 40, it’s less of an urgent matter than it was in their younger days. As a result, couples in their 40s tend to favour quality over quantity when it comes to sexual encounters.
Younger men and women might have a certain sexual attraction, but they don’t come with the experience that you’ve accrued over the years. 40 plus dating means that there’s no need for awkwardness or naïve fumbling. You both have a sexual history and know how to use it.
The best dating sites for over 40 singletons gives you a chance to dive back into the dating scene without the usual pressures. By using chat and messaging services, you can get to know someone before you meet, which takes the worry out of that first date.
In addition, by the time you reach the big 4 – 0, you’re less likely to limit yourself in the dating world. Most of us believed, at some point, that we had a type. With a few relationships under your belt, the likelihood is that you’re open to new ideas and can cast your net that much wider.
Tips for dating when you’re over 40
How to improve your chances in the dating world
The chances are that, if you’re looking for over 40 dating apps or researching the best dating sites for over 40 singles, you’ve been out of the game for a while. You may even have lost a bit of confidence along the way.
We’ve researched some of the best dating tips for 40 plus dating, which can help you increase your chances of finding love online:
- Understand that not every potential match you’re paired up with is going to be right for you. To look at it another way: every match that isn’t right takes you one step closer to finding the one that is. Use dating apps to get to know someone before you take the plunge and meet up
- State your preferences from the outset. If you don’t want to date someone with children, then don’t beat about the bush: state it on your profile page. There’s no sense in being coy about what you want from your online experience and your honesty could well be seen as attractive.
- Try not to slate your ex. If you’re continuously going on about your ex-partner, this tends to communicate the idea that you haven’t fully moved on. For all you know, the person you’re messaging has an ex who badmouths them too, and they won’t be looking for a replacement.
- Think outside the box. Whatever you think your ‘type’ was, try and forget about it. While it’s good to set parameters, it’s also good to be open-minded to new people and those who wouldn’t ordinarily have been on your radar.
- Age is just a number. If you’re convinced that you’re too old to start dating again, then you’ll likely self-sabotage your own efforts to find love. Remember that the users on the best dating sites for over 40 singles are all a similar age to you and don’t seem to have a problem with the idea of dating.
- Be sure that you’re ready. If you’ve come out of a divorce, you might feel like diving back into the pool out of some sort of sense of injustice. Dating sites are there to help you find new love, not to try and exorcise the ghosts of a previous relationship.
- Be honest. Profile pictures can be misleading and if you manage to bag yourself a face-to-face date, you don’t want your match to find you unrecognisable. If you have wrinkles, have put on weight, or have gone bald, embrace it. There’s someone for everyone.
- Don’t be afraid to initiate. One of the great things about online dating is that you have a degree of anonymity. Many users find this quite liberating and those who might have less confidence find that they are able to initiate chats and messaging.
- Take your time and get to know people. Online chat offers the perfect vehicle through which to get to know other users. By finding someone with similar values, life experiences and outlook on life, you’re more likely to enjoy a successful romance.
- Join multiple dating sites. The only way to find the best dating sites for over-40 singles is to shop around. You’ll be casting your net wider and increasing your chances of finding the person you want in your life.
Staying safe while dating online
The best dating sites are those that give you the freedom to interact with other users and explore the romantic possibilities. However, staying safe is an important consideration, particularly if you’re new to the online dating world.
Do take a little time to look over the rules of etiquette on your chosen sites. Not only does it minimise the risk of you putting your foot in it, but it also helps you to recognise inappropriate behaviour.
While you’re at it, take a look at the protocols concerning reporting or blocking other users. While none of us wants to encounter inflammatory or inappropriate behaviour, the truth is that there are idiots everywhere and knowing how to keep them at arm’s length is important.
Many plus-40 dating sites offer free membership. This is a great way to test-drive a site before taking out a subscription. However, once you’ve decided which site or sites you want to subscribe to, be sure to check out their renewal and cancellation policies.
Some sites ‘auto renew’. This means that, unless you cancel your subscription before it expires, you will automatically be charged for the appropriate fee.
It might be old news, but never give out any financial information to other users. Many people from older age groups have fallen foul of online scammers. To prevent yourself from becoming another statistic, remember that the only time you need to enter any details is when you are taking out a subscription.
On that note, it’s also worth checking that payments are encoded and encrypted. That way, your personal information remains safe and secure.
When you sign-up to a plus-40 dating site, you’ll probably need to create a user ID. Don’t use any personal information, such as your phone number, address or date of birth, in the ID. While your username should reflect your personality, it shouldn’t reveal any sensitive information.
Which are the best dating sites for over 40 singles?
Deciding which are the best dating sites for you comes down to what you want from your online experience. You can help yourself by taking some time to ask yourself what you’re prepared to accept in a relationship and what you’re not.
If that question is too hard to answer, then it might be worth asking your friends. Those who know your relationship history may have a better perspective on what works for you and what doesn’t. You may even want to involve them in vetting your potential matches.
An easy way to find the best dating sites is to read impartial reviews. We’ve researched most of the better ones and our reviews will give you no-nonsense insights into what you can expect.
As a rule of thumb, the best way to find out which dating sites are for you is to join a few as a free member. While the messaging services might be limited and you may not be able to view other users’ profiles, you may have access to chatrooms and forums, where you can test the waters.
When you’re looking for anything online, the best advice is to shop around. Check out the subscription fees on a variety of sites and weigh them up against what you get for your money. Some sites offer little extras, such as real-life parties and exclusive offers.
The best dating sites are those that are transparent about what they provide. Sites that come with hidden fees or surprise fees aren’t worth bothering about. Just as you would a potential partner, judge a dating site by its honesty.